Chapter 4

Back in the deep, dark wood, three little pigs stared into a bowl of liquid and watched as the giant began his journey over the ocean. One little pig turned to his brother,

“We need the two aunties, the fat and the thin, together they may bring the giant down and we can return the key to the depths.”

Boss pig rubbed his bristly chin with a perfectly manicured trotter,

“You may be right my brother…unleash the aunties!” he cried.

 

The giant had been travelling across the ocean for hours. Spray and salt lashed his face as the waves crashed against him, yet in his pocket the wizard and the baby curled up, safe amongst the sweeties. As he approached the shore, the giant tapped his pocket gently, rousing the two passengers inside. The boys crept up and peered over the hem of the pocket as the giant pointed.

 

“Land ahoy!”

 

Above the forest ahead of them, they could see the lights dancing merrily in the sky.

 

“We’re definitely in the right place, the lock that this key fits is here somewhere!” shouted the wizard above the crashing noise of the waves.

The superhero baby laughed in agreement before noticing something strange on the shoreline,

 

“What’s that!” he yelled.

 

The three companions stared intently. Before them, two elderly ladies were moving a giant catapult into position. They lined it up and primed it with a huge boulder before pulling back the great elastic band until it quivered tautly…

“Fire!” screeched the thin lady who appeared to be in charge.

 

The two white haired women released the band and thwack, whee! The boulder flew at an impressive speed through the air towards the giant and his passengers!

 

The wizard spotted the incoming missile and shouted out a hurried warning to his gigantic friend,

 

“Watch out!”

 

The giant swerved just in time and watched in shock as the boulder walloped into the ocean with an impressive and thunderous crash!

Sponge climbed gingerly into the elastic belt of the catapult

On the shoreline, the two old ladies, one large, one small, jumped up and down in annoyance

"EEEEEEHHHHHELP!" she wailed as she shot past the giant and the boys

On the shoreline, the two old ladies, one large, one small, jumped up and down in annoyance. The thin one looked to her sister and spoke in a shrill voice,

“Sponge, we must load up more missiles, we cannot let them pass this way with the key!”

 

From then on, the two assailants fired missile after missile, including coconuts, wellington boots and old sandwiches from the huge catapult in the vain hope of striking the giant who loomed towards them from the ocean. Soon, the area around the ladies was bereft of further ammunition, and still the giant came. The thinner of the two spoke harshly to her sister,

 

“Sponge, we need a huge boulder to put in to this catapult or we are doomed!”

One sister, larger than average and sweating profusely from effort, looked at the other. “Spiker, dear, there’s nothing left to use!”

 

Spiker pondered for a moment before looking in a suspiciously hard way at her sister,

 

“There’s nothing for it Sponge, you must get into the catapult!”

 

Sponge had endured much at the hands of her scrawny yet strong sister over the years, but this really was more than could be endured, Sponge attempted a defence. In her deep, melodious voice she began,

 

“Spiker, dear, surely not! There must be another way to stop them…perhaps…”

 

“Nonsense, Sponge! Don’t be such a cry baby! You won’t feel a thing! Think upon it as visit to wet and wild, all fun and laughter, and this is for free dearest!”
Spiker knew better than to argue with her sister. With a forlorn look upon her face, Sponge climbed gingerly into the elastic belt of the catapult.

“Brace yourself Sponge, take the strain!” Spiker issued instructions to her resigned sister as if she were a sergeant major marshalling her troops.

 

“Push back! A little more…more…more…and now…FIRE!”

Spiker released her hold on the elastic with a theatrical flourish.  For a split second, Sponger sat in the catapult’s belt as it whooshed forwards at supersonic speed, carrying her with it. Sponge had enough time to begin to make the shape of a scream with her mouth before the gravitational force wiped it from her face and the catapult flung her into the air like a cannonball. Whilst her ability to shriek had gone with the shock, her ability to hear had not and on the ground below she heard her sister whoop with delight.

 

“Geronimo! Take that you giant and pesky passengers!”

 

In the water, the giant stopped wading and gazed up in astonishment as a huge, round, squealing mass of hair, spectacles and support tights torpedoed towards him.

”Incoming boys! Crash positions! I’m going to have to swerve!” He boomed at the wizard and the baby. Both boys heeded the warning immediately as they too could see the tangle of limbs flying through the air and could imagine the impending collision! They gripped tightly onto the hem of the giant’s pocket as he executed a perfect pirouette, like a prima ballerina from Swan Lake, and leapt gracefully out of Sponge’s flight path. By this point, Sponge was losing momentum and beginning to slow down which allowed her to recover control of her face, mouth and ultimately her voice.

 

“EEEEEEEHHHHHHHHHHELP!” She wailed as she shot passed the giant and the boys and scudded across the water like a skimmed stone, bounce…bounce…bounce…Sponge smacked onto the surface three times, each time emitting a loud

 

“Ouch!”

Before she finally came to a stop. The implosion of such a large object upon the ocean created ripples, which developed into waves, which culminated in a mini tsumani that floated the giant swiftly to the shore. One person’s gain is another’s loss however and Spiker, who had been watching the flight of her sister in a similar way to that in which one observes the launch of a space shuttle, was ill prepared for the wall of water that resulted from her sister’s brush with the ocean. Spiker realised her fate at the very last moment and turned tail to run…but it was in vain…the water nipped at her heels before finally sweeping her Eastwards as if she were a piece of debris.